The Secret Life of Pets 2 (2019)
“The first step of not being afraid is acting like you’re not afraid.” Rather than leaping through hoops or dancing on its hind legs, this sequel to 2016’s dreadful The […]
Tag Archives: Hannibal Buress
Tag (2018)
“We never stopped playing.” Imagine if Peter Pan never grew up but still dabbled in the many vices of adulthood. Picture him smoking weed, visiting the local watering hole for […]
Blockers (2018)
“Who you are today is not who you’re going to be.” With each increasingly gross gag from three desperate parents banding together to stop their daughters’ prom night sex pact […]
The Disaster Artist (2017)
“Just because you want it doesn’t mean it’s gonna happen.” The Disaster Artist frustrated me, but not in the negative ways that you might expect. As a kinda-sorta autobiographical film recreating […]
Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
“I feel like I could be doing more.” As the sixth leading role in a film since the dawn of the new millenium – and the third reboot of the […]
Baywatch (2017)
“Stuck junk is stuck junk.” You probably shouldn’t see this movie if you’re easily turned off by a bounty of cleavage or an onslaught of penis jokes; the film’s focus on […]
The Secret Life of Pets (2016)
“I’ve got a bad situation.” When it comes to animated movies, or even just family friendly flicks appealing mostly to children, I find myself saying the same thing over and […]
Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising (2016)
“I think a lot of this is going on in your head.” Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising is a knockout film for all of the wrong reasons. It bullies its audience into any […]
Daddy’s Home (2015)
“The way I see it, anyone can be a father but not everyone has the patience and devotion to be a daddy.” Somewhere deep, deep down in Daddy’s Home rests a good […]
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